Friday, September 30, 2005
Off To Magical Fruit Town
Tuesday's quote: "Red, it took me sixteen years to get here. You play me, and I'll give ya the best I got."
Wednesday's quote: "Don't you know that eating that stuff can give you very large breasts? Oh my God I'm too late"
Thursdays quote: "Wait a minute. You aren't seriously suggesting that if I get through the wire... and case everything out there... and don't get picked up... to turn myself in and get thrown back in the cooler for a couple of months so you can get the information you need?"
Bonus Quote: "Bear left.'
"I don't know why they call this stuff hamburger helper. It does just fine by itself, huh? I like it better than tuna helper myself, don't you?"
Thursday, September 29, 2005
The Puppet The Legend The Frog
Today's movie quote: "Wait a minute. You aren't seriously suggesting that if I get through the wire... and case everything out there... and don't get picked up... to turn myself in and get thrown back in the cooler for a couple of months so you can get the information you need?"
BONUS Quote: "Bear left.'
Wednesday, September 28, 2005
Add One To The Ol' To Do List
With all of your help I will soon earn credibility in the toilet expert world. This year I was noticibly abscent from the first World Toilet Summit to be held outside the Far East. I doubt much will be accomplished at the conference without my imput but who know's things have been known to go down the crapper before. However there is one idea that I find intriuging. A toilet concealed beneath the pavement during the day, but at night it rises hydraulically for use by late-night revellers.
The average person visits the toilet 2,500 times a year
The first toilet stall in a public washroom is the least likely to be used: it is also the cleanest.
Most toilets flush in the key of E flat
Today's movie quote: "Don't you know that eating that stuff can give you very large breasts? Oh my God I'm too late"
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
Answers to triva:
Friday's movie quote: "Horseshit Rose!"
Monday's movie quote: "Remember me Eddie? I killed your brother."
Today's movie quote: "Red, it took me sixteen years to get here. You play me, and I'll give ya the best I got."
Monday, September 26, 2005
PSA: Robe Fuzzies
Today's move quote:
"Remember me Eddie? I killed your brother."
Friday, September 23, 2005
Anywho, the answers to the Tuesday through Thursday movie quotes.
Tuesday: Outside Providence
Wednesday: Butch Casidy and the Sundance Kid
Thursday: The Big Lebowski
Today's movie quote: "Horseshit Rose!"
Thursday, September 22, 2005
My Opinion Of The Germans
**Girls in traditional Bavarian clothes toast with one-litre beer mugs during the opening day of the Oktoberfest in Munich September 17, 2005. Millions of beer drinkers from around the world will come to the Bavarian capital Munich for the world's biggest and most famous beer festival, the Oktoberfest. The 172st Oktoberfest lasts from September 17 until October 3. Some six million people are expected to visit 14 enormous tents, each capable of holding up to 10,000 people at a time, drinking some 5.5 million litres (1.453 million U.S. gallons) of beer in the process.
In other news: Thank goodness for FEMA and ice in Maine
Today's Movie Quote:|
"Fucking German's, nothing ever changes"
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
Here Comes The Science
I welcome all of you who are smarter than me to assist in the query.
In Katrina relief news: Boobs prevail again
Today's Movie Quote (The answers will be announced on Friday):
"If he'd just pay me what he's paying them to stop me robbing him, I'd stop robbing him."
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
Pavlov's Dog Or Just A Crazy Person
Ok nothing like a little mental illness humor to lighten up all of your day.
Here's to writing something insensitive tomorrow.
On a new to the Benny Hoh Blog front I am now going to start including movie quotes at the bottom of each post. Feel free to guess where they are from. I will reveal the answers on Tuesdays and Fridays.
"Cocked in Rhode Island -Drugs"
Monday, September 19, 2005
Be sure to click on the MP3 at the bottom of the link
People I Know
Anywho I just wanted to call out that this woman most certainly has the Benny Hoh seal of approval
In other news:
I don't usually condone violence but if anybody ever diserved to get the crap kicked out of him it was probably this guy.
In really messed up news: Grandma gets jail time over a bite of food.
Friday, September 16, 2005
1. Unintentional actions such as a particular color worn that can increase one's attractivity. For me there is a color that increases a woman's attractivity by factors of 10.
2. Every woman, no matter how she looks, has at least one part that can take your breath away if highlighted. The picular thing about this is it is more often than not the part is not the typical boobs or legs etc... it is a slight curve in the waist or something as little as an earlope.
Anyway... don't know why I posted about this other than I notice a woman's part the other day and her attractivity increased 10 fold.
On a totally seperate note I want to give a shout out, in the parlence of our times, to a handful of people who know who they are and those who can totally appreciate the 2 to 3 person dance party.
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
Better Stuff To Come
Sorry to those who have no idea what I am talking about. For the rest of you... I might be knocking on your door soon for some x and o advice.
In educational news: "OK" did not become common nomenclature until Martin Van Buren. That's right the 8th president of the US of A. Born and resident until his death of Kinderhook, New York.... My home town.
1. MVB used to sign all documents with OK for Old Kinderhook which in turn popularized the term.
2. If you hold your hands up and make an OK symbol with one hand you will be holding up 8 fingers.
Cool stuff you may not of known about Goonies
The following must me the most hilariously brilliant way to raise money for the victims of Hurricane Katrina. I hope more schools follow suit.
Monday, September 12, 2005
Not Much Today
Poaching is awful but if I can get a hippo for 50 bucks how much can a helper monkey really be?
In is there anything bacon can't do news: Breakfast makes girls skinnier.
Sometimes There Is A Car
Sometimes there is a car that well he’s the car.
Sometimes there is a car that can do it all.
Sometimes there is a car that has more than an owner but a companion.
Sometimes there is a car that the passengers recognize as more than a car.
Sometimes there is a car that is supposed to only seat 5 but has held 11.
Sometimes there is car that can take gunshot wounds as if they were just another pebble in the road.
Sometimes there is a car that despite it being only two wheeled drive can find its way through backwoods and fields of mud.
Sometimes there is a car which may have a pink racing stripe to contrast its white color but that pink racing is more cool than it is fruity.
Sometimes there is a car whose sound system is called into question by its passengers and said passengers are left in the middle of
Sometimes there is a car that can keep a can of tortellini for 9 years.
Sometimes there is a car that can reinforce the bonds of many a friendship.
Sometimes there is a car that has had mix cd’s made more about it than for it.
Sometimes there is a car that has a base of one manufacturer, a front end of another and a steering wheel of yet another.
Sometimes there is a car that turns up many a mystery brazier.
Sometimes there is a car that can haul as much as any truck dared to take on.
Sometimes there is a car other that the General Lee who’s doors did not open and yet posed no hindrance.
Sometimes there is a car that transcends fiction and becomes a true batmobile.
Sometimes there is a car that no matter the disrepair can be fixed with a Forrest Bastard multipurpose knife.
Sometimes there is a car that has a few of the above qualities but rarely does one encompass all of the above. And trust me that was just scratching the surface (pun intended)
That car as many of you know was Kirby who recently retired to
May Kirby cruise that back road in the sky in peace.
Friday, September 09, 2005
30 Seconds Of Your Time
So with your help we just might be able to change that. Please click on this link and pretend you live in San Francisco (94114 is a good zip code to use). With the above link you can send a letter to comcast requesting the Boomerang Channel for your pal Benny.
In pain relief news: According to this Reuters article, if you stick a pager up your ass apparently you will feel better. Can't wait to try this one.
Ummm In noodle appendage news: Ummmm I can't explain this one but have fun
Thursday, September 08, 2005
Where Did All The Cartoons Go?
Any poking, ribbing or general making fun that I receive in repsonse to this request shall at all times be met with this response.
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
We All Do It
In I must of thought of this news: Its a wonder more of us haven't lied awake at night wondering why we didn't thing of this first. I know its been troubling me.
In Mac & Cheese news: Is it possible that the spiral shaped Mac & Cheese tastes best. How can the shape determine the flavor? It must be how the fake powdered cheese clings to the curve of the spiral. This would also explain why the macaroni's shaped like cartoons usually suck, unless its Batman or something else cool.
Monday, September 05, 2005
So I'm A Dork
In Katrina relief news: The people of the Gulf region of this nation are still fucked. However this little blog helped raise $4200 towards relief, and that is just the count of people who have felt so incline to tell me what they donated. Many others have informed me that they gave as well making the number surely larger.
Friday, September 02, 2005
What has been great is many of you readers of the blog have told me you have donated. Props to you all.
Ok...So as not to lose my audience who checks the blog for entertainment.
In hey ladies news: Wouldn't you believe me if I told you I run slowly?
Thursday, September 01, 2005
People I Know
Sooo.... Instead of sitting around feeling bad or awestruck, step the fuck up and help out. Donate to anyone of these reputable charities. A little can go a long way to help peeps. Hell even if its just the jar of change you've been saving that you donate I am sure it will help.
People I Know:
I know a woman who during last year's hurricane season, stepped up and left her job, headed to Florida and went to work for FEMA. I can only hope you all try to step up in some way like she did.
OK I will back to my normal hijinks, tom foolery and shanangins tomorrow.